Flower Power

Rule 37 – Everything’s better with friends and family

     Every year we go through the same thing…

     It’s February, closing in on March. Weather is cold, damp and/or snowy. We have cabin fever. And then the light glimmers on the horizon in the form of the Philadelphia Flower Show. Then we scramble to get tickets!

     By “we”, I mean my sisters, my aunt and myself. This has become an annual event for members of my family. It’s a ritualistic necessity, almost as necessary as the family baseball game. We start the spring, during the first week in March, literally drooling over floral displays at Philly’s Convention Center. The weather outside might be frightful but inside the Center, it is delightfully floral, and spring!

     Each year, the Pennsylvania Horticultural Society chooses a different theme. Many statewide landscape contractors, landscape designers, and professional nurseries present displays illustrating the theme of the year. This year, we had a floral trip to Hawaii in their theme of “Islands of Aloha”.

     You entered in the main concourse “under the sea”. A wave display, accented with orchids, greeted you with flowing holographic images of sea creatures and flowers. Hawaiian music filled the air. You moved from the waves to the shore, where you found a large hut with a steep sloped grass roof. There you were able to view slide show images of the Islands. At times, a light show display accompanied the music. That location also served as stage for Hawaiian dancers.

     The artistic exhibits and the Designer’s Studio were moved to the back of the hall, this year. Designer Studio workshops have been extremely popular in the past and tended to clog traffic flow. Now they occupy a larger space and the demonstrators are visible to more people. The placement also allowed for the artistic designs to be showcased closer together.

     This year the number of showcase exhibitors was down but the number of landscape exhibitors and competitors was up. Tropical plants took over some of the displays. Others seemed to go for xeroscaping with little or no soil. Lava rocks became focal points in some garden displays. Water falls and water features were tucked surprisingly into a number of small displays. Many designers tried to use plants native to Pennsylvania to give an island look to the landscape. This design trend gave hope to gardeners like me, who live in a temperate climate. We saw how we could use familiar plants to achieve a tropical effect.

     The show allowed us to spend the whole day wandering around in garden-Zen euphoria. You don’t even have to leave the show for food. Many food vendors served patrons along the periphery of the building. My party and I took an afternoon tea in the Garden Tea Room. After all the walking, it was a welcome break.

     Recharged from tea and sandwiches, we made our way to the Marketplace inside the fair. Once there, we spread out and shopped for those one-of-a-kind garden additions you can only find from unique craftsmen. Everything from plants to landscape equipment to kitsch was for sale at the Marketplace. We learned to make that our last stop, since we have to carry our purchases back to wherever we left the car.

     The Philadelphia Flower Show runs each year during the first week of March. There is plenty of time to make a day (or 2-day) trip just up I-95 to the Convention Center. For those who avoid city driving, take the Amtrak to Philly’s 30^th St. Station and the Market Street Subway to 12^th and Market. The Convention Center is 2 blocks north of the station. Many of our larger local garden clubs offer bus trips to the show. I’ve even found bus trips offered by a few of my local garden centers! The Flower Show is the Mecca for gardeners.

     The show is now an annual family field trip for me. My sisters and I schedule days off from work just to get together to share our flower power. My aunt makes sure she is up to joining us each year. We are actively recruiting more and more cousins to join us. We just may be able to rent our own family bus soon.

     Next year, the theme is “Brilliant”. It promises to take me to England. Cottage gardens, manor house landscaping, roses, hedge mazes…. I can’t wait!!!

      For more information of the Philadelphia Flower Show, check out the show’s website at http://www.theflowershow.com/showinfo/index.html.

     The Pennsylvania Horticultural Society’s website has links to their projects in and around Philadelphia, as well as links to the Flower Show site. Check out http://www.pennsylvaniahorticulturalsociety.org/phlgreen/index.html for more information.

     And next year look for me and mine! We will be the ones with ice cream cones for lunch and cameras taking pictures of everything!

Hello! Hello!

Rule #15 – Write your observations.

     At the risk of perpetuating stereotypes, Nature is really a female, since Mother Nature has tantrums (storms), peaceful times (high pressure and sunny days), cycles (seasons), and hot flashes (mid-anything heat waves). And on top of all of this, her moods change in an instant. At least, they do where I live.

     Last Tuesday, at 1:14 am, astrological spring arrived. She crept in quietly on an unusually warm night. I was there; because of my dog… he had to go out just at the spring-arrival moment. How did he know to do that? So, at 1:14 am, I am standing outside listening to the silence of the middle of the night. I thought, “Welcome, spring…. Officially!”

     You see, the East Coast just finished with the winter that wasn’t. Very little snow fell, much to the chagrin of all school kids. That is, at least in our area. Since the beginning of February, we experienced intermittent winter and summer weather. It would be cold, and then get really warm, then back to cold again. The colder days were rainy, chilly – you know that kind of raw chill that goes right to your bones. The warmer days were almost summer-like with heat. But you knew it was still February-March when the sun went down and things chilled up. Several seasons in a day – think Ma Nature was PMS-ing?

     Mother Nature’s mid-winter hot flashes brought the trees and flowers out early. Redbuds and Bradford Pears were all in flower in mid-March. Sakura and other flowering cherry and plum trees bloomed earlier than DC’s Cherry Blossom Festival anticipated. Daffodils sprouted and flowered, hyacinths bloomed early and tulips are up and blooming now this last week of March. Normally, these bloom events don’t happen until April.

     While all this makes for a beautiful mental picture, there is a downside to all this. Those of us with allergies are medicating earlier than expected. The hot-cold weather transitions have all the little rhino-viruses going crazy inside little kids and tired adults. It’s times like this that I do not miss being packed like a sardine in a small space with 30-40 middle school kids.

     Another downside is surveying winter damage outside. We may not have gotten a lot of snow. But wind was a frequent visitor (everyone needs to blow off steam sometime). Since I live on a tree-filled lot, I now have a lot of fire wood thanks to the wind events. It’s also time to see what comes back in the spring. You never know what plants are going to make it to the next spring. You never know what bugs were killed off. You never know what tiny livestock might have burrowed its way into your lawn and garden.

     Well, spring inventory is complete. We have lots of fresh firewood and some of it doesn’t have to be chain-sawed up. I found more mole-holes than I can count and I’m hoping a black snake might have moved into one or two of them. Chrysanthemums must have been annuals after all, since I don’t see any new sprouts. Peas are sprouted and in the veggie bed. Back flower beds are cleaned out of dead leaves. Front flower beds are in process of being cleaned out. Liriope is hornier than ever, spreading and getting thick. It’s a great edging plant but it just loves one of my front beds. Guess I should pull a bunch of it out. English ivy needs a cut down, before it takes over its little corner of the shaded part of my yard. Bees are buzzing, stinkbugs are back (darn!), and mosquitoes are starting to hang out again.  At times like this, I think, who needs a gym membership? Yard work is an aerobic activity and is something handy, free, and actually saves you money. And it reduces stress!

     Are we done with yard work yet? Not hardly! I still have to trim the ivy, like I said before, clean out one more azalea bed, pull ivy off the tree trunks and from around the bases, get rid of some of the liriope, dig up some of the sticker vines in the back, trim some of the understory of the trees in the back of the yard… and the list continues. Am I worried it won’t get done? Not hardly!

     You see, gardening actually helps me, mentally and physically. I got into gardening big time when I was teaching. My career started with high school Home Economics and ended with middle school Family and Consumer Sciences (Home Ec with a classier name). I really did enjoy teaching the kids and loved the teen kids (well, someone has to). But they (and their parents) did get on my nerves more than occasionally. My choice was to dead-head flowers or dead-head kids. Hmmm…. Which one wouldn’t land me in jail? Flowers won.

     Yes, I’ve got “the fever” – spring fever! Big time! I can’t wait to start putting flowers in. Got to get more seeds going!

     But, Ma Nature, you always have the last say at this time of the year. So what’s with a freeze warning tonight? Come on, Ma! More PMS? Make up your mind!

     Oh, and (ouch) where did I hide the Ben-Gay?

She's got a ticket to Burger Nirvana

Rule #3 – Write from your experiences.

Dear Bobby Flay,

     To start with, YOU ROCK!!! I’ve always enjoyed watching you grill up a storm on TV. But now I am able to sample your recipes first hand? Let’s just say, I’m in heaven!

     My past two trips to New Jersey introduced me to your Bobby’s Burger Palace in Cherry Hill. My sister is a regular there and recommended, what she calls, the best burgers on the planet. I was a bit hesitant to try the restaurant, since I’m trying to watch my weight. But even on the strictest of weight reduction plans, an occasional burger works. After all, it’s not the burger itself, but all the stuff that goes with it. And the word of the way is “occasional”, right?

     The atmosphere from the décor is a trip back in time. Colors and designs remind me of the Mod days of the 60’s and 70’s. The music is classic, too. Your sound system was pumping in the Rolling Stones, the Kinks, and Credence. I half expected to turn around and find Austin Powers enjoying a meal nearby. We sat at the counter and grooved and ate, ate and grooved, talked to counter-mates, grooved and ate some more.

     Both of us ordered burgers cooked to order. They were delivered exactly as ordered. Living in the Baltimore-Washington area now, I craved a bit of Philly, so I got the Philadelphia burger. It was a perfect portion of fresh ground beef, hand-formed and cooked to perfection at medium-well. A slice of provolone cheese, grilled onions on top of a soft, sesame seed roll and this transplant was close to cheesesteak heaven. The burger came with jalapenos but I requested them on the side. And your crew obliged! I did elect not to crunchify the burger (add potato chips to the burger). But I love the fact that I can choose my burger toppings, and I’m not stuck with the stock recipe. My sister was even able to avoid the sesame seeds on her burger bun with no problem.

     The big splurge was the fries. I am highly addicted to sweet potato fries. When I fix them at home, I dip into maple syrup for a Thanksgiving Day rewind for the taste buds. You have a honey mustard horseradish dipping sauce that is spectacular!! I cruised your website to see if I could buy some for myself, but no go – yet. I sure hope you choose to market that particular product. It has such a great mix of sweet and spicy, yet it was not hot at all. My taste buds salute you for this sauce. And those onion rings reminded me of bangle bracelets, they were so big! Lovin’ it!

     On my next visit, I plan to save enough calories to indulge in a milk shake, with whipped cream, of course. I may try another sandwich or salad on the menu. Maybe I’ll go for the best of both worlds and have a Topless Burger. Lucky for me, I don’t have to go too far to find a BBP. There’s one just off the George Washington University campus in DC. One of these days, I’ll venture down on the Metro Orange line to Foggy Bottom, walk over to 21^st and K Streets, and take my taste buds and psyche for a trip down memory lane and into nirvana.

     I hear you are opening a restaurant at Maryland Live at Arundel Mills. I just can’t wait to see which one it will be. A Mesa Grill? A Steak House? A Bar Americain? Another Burger Palace? I’ll be checking your website, http://bobbyflay.com/restaurants, to see which one and when it will open. As they say, I’m chomping at the bit.

     Maybe our paths will cross at one of your restaurants. Till then…

Sincerely,

A True Foodie, Me

To AC from DC

Rule number 6: A writer needs to honor traditions, for there are stories within.

     Poor New Jersey. It never really had a true identity. It was either West New York, East Philadelphia or Atlantic City. The concept of “Jersey Shore” was not a Snooki-ism back then. It was the only identity Jersey had.

     A long, long time ago, as a child, I went to Atlantic City, New Jersey. It was a different world then.

     In the 1950’s and 60’s, you could not access the beach by going under the Boardwalk; you had to go over it. You could not wear your bathing suit on the Boardwalk, even with a cover-up; you had to change in the bath house – for a price. Atlantic City was not a place to take young children who enjoyed amusement rides, since there were very few piers that catered to families in this manner.

     At that time, my family was a frequent visitor to Wildwood, New Jersey. Even back then, it was a more family friendly place to vacation. That Boardwalk had pier after pier of amusement rides and quite the carnival atmosphere. Atlantic City had an atmosphere that was more “upscale”. We walked the Boardwalk around dusk and saw women dressed up in dresses and heels. Furs abounded. Men were dressed in summer suits. Many women wore hats and so did the men. It looked more like a parade of fashion than a vacation where you shed the cares of home and bummed for a bit. Dressing down was a big no-no there, where in Wildwood, it was expected.

     Hotels were high-rises in Atlantic City. Old fashioned, art deco designs blended with Victorian designs to produce a very sophisticated atmosphere. Supper clubs were all over at that time. Many stars of the era got their start in Atlantic City clubs. The Boardwalk was home to many shops, restaurants, and candy stores. Once you left the Boardwalk, the atmosphere, however, changed. Venture far off the boards, and you entered a world of poverty. There were sections of Atlantic City that resembled the poorer, more neglected sections of Philadelphia.

     Enter “Casino Gambling” in the late 1960’s and 70’s. The whole plan was to revitalize Atlantic City, bring it back to its former glory. Let’s look at what happened.

     The first casino was Resorts International. They took over the original Claridge Hotel and made interior changes. The outside façade stayed the same. Then came the other casino conglomerates and changed the Boardwalk landscape into Vegas East. Lots of glitz and lights… lots of big name performers… Atlantic City became a destination after your career was going well, not a springboard stop on the road to success.

     The city took several hurricane hits over this time period. Steel Pier was wiped out as I knew it. No more ballroom with the Ed Hurst Dance Party. No more Diving Horse Show.  Now there is nothing there really, nothing at all.

     My recent visits to Atlantic City left me a bit sad for the town. I got the feeling it’s still trying to find an identity. I think it’s looking for an identity that might incorporate casinos, but not be defined by casinos. That’s going to be a tough change. Lots of tradition left Atlantic City when the casinos came were built. Even Miss America left town.

     Leave the Boardwalk, and there are still depressed areas of the city – areas that no developer would think of touching. Dressing up is now no longer as important. Most people don’t stroll the Boardwalk, except to get from casino to casino. But at least the covered push chairs are still there.

     So what, really, has changed in all these years? The time stamp on the video of life? Values? Nothing? Hmmmmm – something to think about… but I really miss the older architecture taking me back in time.

     Guess I may have to start watching “Boardwalk Empire” to get an “old Atlantic City” fix. It’s come to that…. sad, very sad!

Hey, St. Jude...

Hope Springs Eternal

Authors try to make connections…

A few things happened this past week. Valentine’s day – or as I would like to call it “Volunteer’s Day”, since volunteering shows love and concern and it is not limited to those in romantic relationships. (Who needs another friggin’ diamond, anyway?) President’s Day holiday, which means that George Washington’s and Abraham Lincoln’s images were used to sell everything ubiquitous from cars to mattresses. Maryland had another non-snowstorm – ok, this is not a negative. If you know how Marylanders react to snow warnings, you would see how this non-snow event can be a positive in our lives. Yes, world, there is still toilet paper on the store shelves in Maryland, as of today. I started another class at church. Oh, and baseball spring training began. Pitchers and catchers reported over this past weekend. The rest of the prospects will come in to camp this week, with full squad workouts beginning this weekend coming.

These last two brought something to mind that I really didn’t consider before – Is it ok to pray for a winning season for the Orioles? Is it really wrong?

Some of my friends and relatives believe we shouldn’t bother God with such minor details. There are plenty of other crisis items to pray for in this world. They say we should be praying for world peace, or social justice, or dissolution of evil in the world. God doesn’t have time for trivialities like “Please let the O’s win more than 69 games this year.”

Well, who are we to judge what God wants to hear about? I mean, after all the prayers about failing politics and failing economies, He just might like to kick back and talk baseball for a bit. Who really knows?

Let’s see if the O’s really need divine intervention this year. The team changed general managers after the 2011 season. The players won only 69 games and lost 93 games out of the 162 played. It didn’t matter if they were home or on the road, the Orioles, by all standards, had another losing season. This last one was their 14^th straight. This is not the formula to put even occasional fans in the Camden Yards seats. Only die-hards, still have season tickets, and even the number of die-hards is dwindling. There were a few other major league teams with worse records – and I thank Pittsburgh for being one of them.

From the fan front, last years games were sometimes painful to watch. Jeremy Guthrie would pitch his heart out, only to get zero run support. The bats would be healed only to have the bullpen serve up the game with walks-a-million. They couldn’t pull anything together. The only streak they had was the one each player took running from the locker to the showers after the game. It seemed to me that they lost the fun of baseball, and lost it early in the season. It became an attitude thing. They couldn’t lose the attitude.

There is no one person to blame. Usually, the team manager takes the hit when the team fails to perform. The O’s have changed managers in the past few years more often than some people change their socks. The lack of stability, I’m sure, has messed with everyone’s head. They are starting to really believe their own bad press.

As an armchair athlete, the only thing I can do to help the team is pray. Sounds dorky, I know. I watch them, I go to the yard, I support them with good vibes… but really, all I can do is pray that the team changes its team attitude. I pray they start to enjoy playing baseball. I pray the players stop thinking of Baltimore as a stop on the train to the line-ups in New York or Boston. I pray the management stops thinking of the O’s as a bad-boy rehab facility (please do NOT sign Manny!) I pray we all can just have fun playing and watching baseball.

It really was a fun game at one time. Then the money crept in… and the salaries, and the diva attitudes.

With this in mind, I let my occasional math-nerdness take over and do some calculations. Full squads start around February 24-25. The first spring training game is March 5. That’s about 9 days, correct? My prayer-nerdness says “Novena time!”

For those of you who don’t know what a novena is, it is an opportunity for 9 days to pray for a specific intention. Many Catholics pray novena prayers asking specific saints to run some interference with the Lord to have the intention granted (like when your dad said “no” to something you wanted to do, so you talked to your mom and she talked to your dad about it). Some saints in the church are the “go-to” for specific intentions, like St. Anthony to help you find what you lost. St. Jude Thaddeus, one of the original 12 Apostles, is the go-to guy for hopeless cases or desperate situations. Hmmmm – is the 2012 baseball season a desperate situation? Are the O’s in need of the Patron of Hopeless Cases to run some divine interference for them? Maybe…

Anyway, prayer can’t hurt. It can help you feel like you are doing something positive. Meditating, sending positive waves or vibes, does the same thing. We fans are not in control of the team’s performance. Only the players are. We just need to be able to cheer for the guys. So here goes – my prayers for the 2012 baseball season starting this weekend:

St. Jude,

Please allow the Orioles (or insert team of choice) play their best baseball during this 2012 season. Please allow good health to all players. Please allow the players to keep a positive attitude about their game. Please allow management to lead and not interfere.  Please remove the fear of success from the hearts of players, press, and fans alike. And please allow everyone just to have fun and be safe this season. For this, I pray, Amen.

No, I’m not asking for the World Series. I’m not asking for a winning season. See, the O’s have the talent. Their heads are just wearing the losing habit. Winning is a habit, and so is losing. The team has to get over the mental roadblocks to success. Talent-wise, they could go all the way. Now if they can only keep their heads in the game…

You will see more on the Orioles as the season progresses. You will also see writing about the Phillies and Nationals, two other teams near and dear to my heart. And, yes, I pray for a safe and healthy year for all players – and the fans.

It’s spring and there’s hope in our hearts.

Super Bowl on the sidelines - sort of

Ahhhh! Super Bowl Sunday! Another made-in-America holiday! Is this a nice break from the winter doldrums or is it our chance to celebrate the coming of spring without the interference of a rodent? Two really interesting questions…

Now, before you think I scored some tickets to Indianapolis on February 5, I have to ‘fess up – I was an Occupier. Yep, I occupied a chair in my sister’s kitchen to watch the game. I was one of the 99% who could have cared less who won the game, since my Ravens were bounced – or “not reviewed” – out of the competition two weeks previous. Our goal for the evening was to watch the much-touted commercials that were rudely interrupted by a football game. We sat there – the two of us – one Ravens fan and one Eagles fan – rooting for the impossible – a good game. She was sort of rooting for the Patriots and I was sort of rooting for the Giants. I say “sort of” since neither of us really liked either team. That dislike progressed as we listened to the commentary through the game. Al Michaels, as always, was a stellar, classy commentator, but his partner in crime, Chris Collinsworth, showed his serious man-crush for all things Brady, Manning, and Rothlisberger. That attitude in reporting soured this fan’s viewing of the game.

But let’s talk about the commercials. Corporations spend millions to advertise during the Super Bowl. Costs actually vary as to which quarter your spot will air. First and second quarter ads cost more than 4^th quarter ads. And why, pray tell? The “(*&*” game! Most past games have been blow outs. By the time the viewer gets to the first quarter, they have already seen about six hours of pregame hype, one hour of true pregame, a pregame show, and then the National Anthem and ceremonial coin toss. The viewer has already consumed a ton of food and in some cases, a “few” adult beverages. We’re talking viewer coma here, folks. Viewers are in party mode and the game is background noise by kickoff, especially if your team isn’t among the players. By the fourth quarter, the question is usually, “Is this game still on?” So ask a party-hearty viewer what were the commercials like or who won (or played) the game, and they will tell you the next day – after they hit YouTube to see what they missed. Can we understand why some people refer to this as Stupor Bowl Sunday?

This year’s commercials had the usual fare. Same old companies tried to best last year’s spots. Some succeeded – and very nicely. I enjoyed the M&M commercials. They ran subtle adult humor that is not over the top and offensive to kids. Doritos ran some new spots that had you wondering what they were thinking. I must admit, though, that I now have a good use for a motorized wheel chair and a Johnny-Jump-Up to stop a bully older brother. The Coke Bears were back with impressive spots, too. Sketchers ad with the jogging pug was a belly laugh at the end.  Budweiser’s history lessons were really enjoyable to watch. It’s nice to know the E-trade baby now has a sister. Can’t wait to see how she gets working into the investing scene! Beer commercials! Car commercials! Oh, and we can’t forget the annual salute to soft-porn, Go Daddy commercials!

I was eagerly anticipating the Ferris Buehller knock-off Honda commercial. I saw the full length on the internet just a few days before. Could not wait to see how it got cut up for prime time. Jerry Seinfeld’s Acura commercial was pretty funny, too. You would expect nothing less from Seinfeld. The best of the evening was Clint Eastwood’s “America’s Halftime” Chrysler commercial. It left me with a dropped jaw and bit of a tear from the eyes. Powerful, hopeful, encouraging – all the things our country’s citizens need at this time in our economic history. Perfect! It gave us all something to look forward to this year.

The half time show was pretty good, compared to recent ones. Madonna gave a great performance, along with some help from C-Lo and M.I.A. I managed to miss M.I.A.’s “salute” to the fans. Big whoop! She showed her “class” – or lack of it. Who will we see next year? Whose career will need a defibrillator that bad? Super Bowl halftime show is no place to try and bring any career back from the dead.

Oh, yeah, there was a game going on too (or as we liked to say “potty breaks”). It didn’t look to be much of a game in the beginning, the way the Patriots took off to a 17 -2 lead. By half time, things looked a bit more promising. During the second half, it actually turned into a nail biter – go figure! The Giants got ahead, then the Patriots came back, then the Giants had a typical Jersey sit-down in the end zone to take the lead back. Fans of both teams chewed their nails to the quick in the last minute wondering how this would end. And it ended for the Patriots with what I call “Raven’s Revenge” – the last play, with 2 seconds on the clock, and a pass that’s dropped in the end zone – the same way the Ravens lost to the Patriots 2 weeks before. Sorry Tommy, Eli beat you out – just!

Ahhhh, yes, the Super Bowl is over! Now we enter No-Fans-Land for the next few weeks until baseball spring training starts. March Madness is coming soon to a recliner and chip bag near you, too.

 At least the movies on cable are good now… Major League, A League of Their Own, The Natural… It Happens Every Spring!

Yes, Clint, I am hopeful as baseball approaches. I have something to look forward to… Come on, Spring!

Wanted - Knowledge about the unexplainable

An author must continue to learn – and not just about how to write a coherent sentence.

The theology class I just completed got me thinking….

As a youngster, I was always asking questions. I went to Catholic grammar schools and some of my questions came out of those religion classes. The questions about the existence of God were big ones. Little did I know then that the whole concept was always up for discussion. I took the theology course as part of my church volunteer work and was introduced to many writings on God, the Trinity and how it can apply to life today.

It seems like St. Augustine and St. Thomas Aquinas, and a whole host of others have been debating this issue for centuries. Now, you add into the mix physicists like Dr. Michio Kaku, and archeologist/scientist Erik Von Danikan and the debate rises to a whole new level of philosophy. Yes, science geeks, the debate rages on and it’s not just for Biblical scholars anymore. Looks like a marriage finally happened between science and the Bible somewhere along the line. Not always a blissful marriage either.

All I know is that after each class meeting I had such a headache! This “God” idea is not an easy concept to contemplate. I remember asking my mom about some abstract God information as a kid and she would always say to put that question aside on a list until you get to heaven. Keeping that in mind, over the years I’ve compiled quite an extensive list of questions. Some of them seem silly but they are real questions I’ve had in the past. Don’t you have some things you would like to ask God too? I mean, aside from the obvious “Why is there evil in the world?” and Why is there war?”

Here are some of my questions for when I hit the Pearly Gates:

• The mosquito – what is the purpose???? I mean, come on, Lord! The state “bird” of Maryland and New Jersey?????  What were You thinking?

• Why is it so easy to be selfish?

• How can you tell the difference between self-serving and self-defensiveness?

• Why does chocolate taste so good? Why does it need sugar and fat to make it better?

• Why is the sky blue? It’s so pretty, so please don’t say that it is all perception of visual light lengths. Can we leave it as just plain pretty?

• Why do the deer of the neighborhood seem to love my garden and leave my neighbors alone? Is it me? What am I planting that make them love me? Or is my yard the first decent “restaurant” on the block?

• Which heathen animal keeps knocking my St. Francis statue over? No, I am not going to hurt it.

• How did You come up with the ostrich? It defies physics. Was this a “it’s-5:58 pm-and-I–have-to-clean-up–this-place-for-the-Sabbath” creation of leftover spare body parts? And if You were going to give it a face only its mother could love, why did You also give it a 25-mile stink? Remember that trip we took to New Mexico? Oy, the smell!

• Why did You allow us to invent pockets? It seems like someone is always needing them filled, wanting us to empty them, or picking them when we aren’t looking.

• Do You really look like George Burns? (“Oh God” movies) Or is my visualization based on my prayer relationship with You?

• Have You been talking to Erik Von Daniken directly or is he just guessing about that alien colonization thing? By the way, those Nazca Lines are great! My compliments to the artists.

• Why do so many people expect someone – or some government agency – to take care of them? Is that why You allowed us to get kicked out of the Garden of Eden? So we could learn for ourselves?

• Why do people refuse to learn – from anything? Why do they prefer stupidity, aspire to mediocrity and avoid courageous action?

• If the big bang happened in the vacuum of space, is it still a big bang, or just a small fart? (Yes, I’m serious about this one. It’s a perception of sound thing.)

• Is technology of all kinds really the Biblical Antichrist? George Orwell wasn’t just smoking funky stuff when he wrote 1984, was he?

• With this concept of salvation, what am I being saved from, or am I being saved for something? How will I know the difference?

• Are all these scientific discoveries really You revealing Yourself to us in a magnificent way at a time in space when human minds can comprehend the information?

• With that thought, then, when will You help us cure cancer? Or does disease exist to make us appreciate our healthy times?

• What’s the difference between being really lazy and just needing rest?

• Oh, and just so I don’t sound like I’m nagging again, thank you for music! That’s among Your better gifts to humankind.

That’s just a sampling of what has been rattling around in my cranial cavity for years and years. Yes, you can all now agree with my thesis advisor – I think too much and overthink more. Some of my former students would remind me that I need a life.

How about you all? What questions might you have for God? Maybe you acknowledge the Higher Power by a different name. That’s cool, since we all have varying life experiences. Hey, I’m no preacher by any stretch of the imagination (my kids may disagree). This is a big world and there’s room for us all. And we all have the choice to believe or not. This could be a great contemporary discussion! And probably no one would win the debate.

Some people may point to the evil in the world and bad things that happen to them personally and say “Why believe in  a God? What’s the point?”

I prefer to look at it this way – Life without God is like trying to write with a broken pencil – no point to it! I need the hope that belief brings to me. At least, that's my opinion. What's yours?